Monday, October 23, 2006

Melancholy

Fall is generally my favorite time of year.
Theres a crispness in the air that allows me to pull out two of my favorite clothing items - sweaters and hooded sweatshirts.
The heat is no longer so oppressive that it makes me too lazy to do anything.
For the first time in months, it feels "right" to drink caramel apple ciders.
Knitting is more enjoyable - the yarn is no longer heavy and hot.
Night time high school football games.
Falling leaves & their changing colors.
Cuddling up with my puppy to watch a movie.

Usually this is the season in which I'm the most upbeat and sociable. The season and its atmosphere just makes me want to be with the favorite people in my life.

Then something happens. A disagreement with a relative, a close friend, whomever or whatever, and the sadness settles in.
All of a sudden, all of the things that I dislike about my life become harder and harder to look past. Everything that I would like to change is seemingly larger and more complex than before. The lonliness is palpable, the debts seem to be astronomical, and even things that looked like great opportunities as recent as just a week ago now seem to be comletely unattainable pipe dreams - and all I want to do is curl up with a warm blanket and wait for the melancholy to pass.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yuck! That's no good to not enjoy Fall. I think you should come visit me and we'll drink caramel apple ciders together. My puppy is also very snuggly.

Maya said...

I think you're having withdrawls from our fun weekend. I do hope that the melancholy passes soon. Will be at the pub on Sunday afternoon for some SERIOUS knitting.

Valerie said...

Hugs mamacita! I can totally relate.